Perfection
by WeHoldTheseTruths
Summary: What she wanted was a perfect, heart-shatteringly happy love. Too bad she got something less than perfection.


I know! I have been painfully inactive for the past year. So here is a little treat for all my lovely readers! So enjoy! This goes out to JaliceLove! Who has started her freshmen year in college this fall! I wished to write something sooner for you love, but I couldn't find the time. So have a fun year my dear!

Disclaimer- I don't own Naruto!

* * *

Perfection

_I love you with so much of my heart, _

_That there is none left to protest..._

_- Lady Beatrice_

* * *

Ino sighed and leaned against the built-in bookcases that surrounded her window seat. She stared at the book that laid open in her lap for a moment before looking out at the clear night sky through her open window. _I want that, _she thought desperately, closing her eyes, _an unyielding perfect love._ Though no one really knew it, Ino loved to read. She loved the idea of being taken away into another world, where she could simply become engrossed by whatever make-believe the author had come up with. She knew better, than to base true life off of the fairytales and fiction that she had been reading lately (non-fiction had been getting old, one can only read so many biographies), but she couldn't help but yearn for the type of love that left one heart-shatteringly happy. _Too bad it doesn't exist_, she thought bitterly.

Suddenly, the atmosphere changed, and she became painfully aware of another presence in the room. She didn't react. Instead, she continued to look out her window, ignoring the person who was standing on the other side of the room, watching her intently. She knew whom it was, there was only one person who would dare sneak into her room this late at night, and she hated him for knowing that she would do nothing to prevent it.

"What are you doing here Shikamaru?" she asked after a few moments of silence.

"I haven't seen you in years, and this is how you greet me?" he asked in a tired, incredulous tone.

"Answer my question."

"Troublesome," he sighed and stepped forward into the pale moonlight, "I wanted to see you, why else would I be in your room at 2 o'clock in the morning."

"I see," she replied curtly, standing up to replace her book on its shelf and moved to sit on the bed. She motioned for him to sit down. "How was your mission?"

He took the seat at her desk and turned to face her. "Troublesome, having to move from one country to the next every year."

"It couldn't have been that bad," she said coldly, "After all, I heard that you had company along the way."

* * *

Ino remembered the day he left as clear as day. She had learned that he had been commissioned as ambassador for Konoha, in order to improve relations with the other Great Nations, after the whole mishap at the meeting of the Kages and the war.

Temari had arrived a week prior to escort him back to the Sand, which irritated Ino. The Sand sibling was too close, too clingy for her taste; she wished sincerely that she would just leave. Ino had once expressed her feelings to Shikamaru, who had scoffed and replied, _there's only room in my heart for one troublesome woman, and unfortunately, you've filled that spot. _It was a small comfort, to hear those words, because even though they hadn't said anything, there was an attraction, and an unspoken bond that had developed between them. She didn't want to lose it because of some slut who had come barging into their lives.

The day for departure came, and Ino was on her way to the gates to see him off. She held a small package with her, that contained two things, a letter, officially proclaiming her feelings for him, and a small box that contained a key, to the new house that she had purchased. Well, it wasn't new per say, in fact it was on the verge of falling apart, but she had plans for the place, that she hoped she would finish in time for his homecoming. She had rounded the corner when she had spotted the two together, his arms were wrapped securely around her waist, and hers were looped around his neck. The sight broke her heart and Ino instantly turned and ran the other direction. She had taken to the roofs, quickly stopped at the gates and shoved the box in Choji's hands. _Give this to him will you?_ She had asked. _I have work to do, so I don't have time to stay._ She gave him a quick smile before taking off again, heading for her new haven. After that, there had been no contact, only tidbits of news every few weeks.

* * *

"I suppose," he said carefully, wondering why she was being so cold. "But it was tiresome to keep moving around."

Silence fell between them for a few moments. He studied her carefully from his seat across from her. She had grown so much in the past four years. She was no longer a naïve teenager, no longer the foolish seventeen year-old he had left behind all those years ago. She was a woman, in every sense. Her physical appearance had grown to that of a mature woman, hardened by countless hours of training, but still soft and pleasing to the eye. He could see now that she wasn't as hot tempered and petty as before, she was more centered and focused than he had ever seen. But there was something disturbing about her, something that had never been there before when he was around.

Shikamaru knew for a fact that Ino wore a mask, one that hid her true self, her real raw emotions, in order to fool everyone around her. It was her greatest technique of all. The Ino that sat before him now was wearing that mask; it was an eerily perfect one that had no cracks or weak spots. It was solid, complete perfection. He was not used to her being so guarded around him. The time that had spent alone together, had been uncensored, she freely showed her true colors. It was the Ino that he had grown to love and adore, whether she knew it or not.

"I heard," he said breaking the silence, "About the missions and becoming Ibiki's apprentice."

"Successor," she corrected, looking rather pleased with herself, "I'm the lead interrogator in the T&I department now."

He was shocked for a moment, he had heard about the apprenticeship a year ago, while he was staying in the Mist. "Ibiki retired then?"

"No, he's still the head of the department," she replied. "The old fool doesn't know when to quit."

He noticed the affection in her voice when she spoke of her mentor. She really had changed.

"What have you been doing while I was gone?" he asked. "S-ranked missions? The interrogations? The apprenticeships? Tsunade told me that after I left you immediately took the Jounin exam and then applied for ANBU. She also told me you wouldn't accept anything lower than B ranked missions now? Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"No," she replied coolly, "I'm trying to make myself something."

"You are something! You're shinobi of the Leaf, is that no good enough for you?"

"It isn't." she said angrily. "I was tired of being the one left behind, always have to have someone else defend me when I should be able to take care of myself. With Shizune and Tsunade, I learned medial jutsu to help heal my comrades, I learned better chakra control, and I learned how to become stronger. When I became I Jounin I started to study more, I trained more and I was able to expand my knowledge of jutsu. With Ibiki I learned more and more about the human mind, I learned how to enter and control it without jutsu or chakra, I learned how to manipulate and twist memories. I learned how to perfect my own family jutsu, I learned more and more jutsu, and I even created my own. ANBU was just something to make my going on missions easier. My skills would be most useful there." She paused and looked at him in the eye. "I became more than just a useless girl who stood on the sidelines. I'm stronger now. I'm one of the elite. I can finally do some good with my abilities."

"I never thought you were useless," he murmured only loud enough for her to barely hear.

"But you still threw me away like a piece of trash," she sneered.

He could see it, the contempt and hatred that she harbored for him for these past four years. He finally understood why she was so cold, so angry.

"What exactly did you see?" he asked, carefully assessing the situation.

"Enough."

"Ino, it wasn't-"

"I don't want your excuses," she spat. "I can see it in your eyes Shikamaru. The regret, the realization, the shame and I could care less about what you must be feeling at the moment. So tell me, what was the real reason you came here tonight."

He hesitated, wondering if telling her the truth was the right thing to do. But he knew that even if he didn't, Ino would find a way to get it, on way or the other. "The letter," he said hesitantly, "I hadn't read it or even opened the box until a few months ago."

A flash of hurt crossed her face, "I see."

"I hadn't thought that your feelings for me were real." He explained carefully. "You had never said anything so I attempted to move on."

She was no longer looking at him, instead she was staring that the book she had been reading before.

"I knew about Temari's feelings for me," he continued. "I thought that if I was to move on, I might as well choose someone who already had feelings for me. I was afraid to open the box, so I shoved it into my pack, promising Choji that I would open it when I had the chance. While I was clearing out my desk back in the Mist I found it again, I had tossed it into one of my drawers without really thinking about it. I wondered why I hadn't thrown it away, why I couldn't let this little piece of you go." He chuckled humorlessly. "I guess my curiosity got the better of me. I was thoroughly surprised when I read the letter. I had never expected you to return my feelings so whole-heartedly. The key to your house was a surprise too. The fact that you had gone so far as to offer me a place to come back to was touching. I instantly regretted my decisions."

She continued to stare that the book, even while she spoke. "You broke my heart. I never wanted to see you again, to hear your voice, or feel you touch. I hated you with every fiber of my being." She got up and took out the book again and tossed it at him. "That was how I thought our life would be when you got back." She pointed at the book, she was nearly yelling now. "I wanted you to love me like I loved you, but I see now that it could never happen."

"Ino," his voice was shaking, "please."

"Leave," she said. "I don't want you here."

He put the book down and looked at her for a long moment before he turned and blended in with the shadows, leaving her to cry by herself.

* * *

It was weeks after the incident, and Ino hadn't encountered Shikamaru at all. Instead she focused all of her time in studying, training, and finishing up the last few projects she had left to do in the house.

It was a fantastic house really. It was an old traditional style home with two stories, much like the Nara residence. She had taken the time to repair the outer walls and repaint them, carefully working her way outside in. She had taken care of the outer garden next, weeding, planting, watering, and nursing the neglected space back to its original glory. She had moved onto the exterior of the main building, hiring carpenters to refurbish the roof and exterior walls, and immediately commissioned them to begin on the inside as well. The wooden floors were sill in good conditioned, so she sanded them down and re-varnished every single surface, before moving onto the sliding doors. She replaced all the rice paper, had new doors made to replace the ones that were beyond repair, and finally moved onto the inner courtyard, saving the rest of the rooms for last. She had done the same to the inner garden as she had done to the outer, taking the time to restore the large koi pond and rebuild the tiny bridge that once stood over it. When everything was in order with the outside, she moved onto the rooms, starting with the kitchen and bathroom, updating all the fixtures, tiles, appliances, and counter-tops, fashioning it in a modern-traditional style. The living room was up next, and it also received the same treatment. The walls were painted, furniture and accessories were moved in, and all in all it was cozy yet stylish. There five bedrooms total, two of which were located on the first floor and the other three on the second. The first two were turned into a guestroom and office/library. The guestroom was finished while the office was still a work in progress. The two upstairs rooms were also turned into guest rooms, while the largest was turned into the master bedroom. Ino loved her room. It was her sanctuary. So she had modeled it after a cool Zen like spa, even adding a good-sized bathroom that included a shower. Today she was finished the office. She had just moved her desk out of her room and was preparing to build the rest of the bookshelves when she heard the front door slide open. Once again, Ino felt the familiar unwanted presence enter her home, and wander toward her direction.

"You've done a lot to this place," the lazy voice called, "I remember seeing it before I left. It was a wreck. Did you do all of this by yourself?"

She snorted loud enough for him to hear and he chuckled in reply, "I thought so."

He reached her place and surveyed the current chaos that was displayed. "Is this the last room then?"

"Yes," she answered curtly.

"Would you like some help? I know how you hate to put this stuff together."

She pondered for a moment. The least this ass could do was help her build some furniture. He owed her all that and more.

"Fine," she replied, "Start with those shelves over there, I'm going to finish painting that wall."

He nodded and sat before the pile of boxes that contained all the bookshelves he would have to assemble. They worked quietly for sometime, neither one breathing a word. The only sounds were that of sloshing paint and the clanging of wood and tools. However, as Shikamaru approached finishing his first shelf he spoke.

"I read the book," he said as he continued to work.

Ino paused for a moment and looked at him, slightly confused. "What book?"

"The book you threw at me."

"How?"

"I remembered the title and went to go find it," he replied still working on the shelf. "I wanted to see what you meant. It was completely unrealistic. There is no man alive that is that dedicated and that passionate about loving a single girl. He would have to be one hell of a man to do all of that just for her."

"I used to think you were that kind of person," she said quietly, putting her brush and paint down, examining her work. "I used to think that our lives would end happily like that too."

"A life like that is impossible," he said, "With the type of lives that we lead."

"Still," she continued. "I thought that it would be possible for us."

"But you don't believe that anymore?"

"I learned to stop believing in fairytales."

"I see." He stopped working and put down the screwdriver he had been holding and walked toward her. "I wish you hadn't stopped."

She looked at him and began to move away, to the other side of the room. "And why is that? So you could break my heart all over again?"

"No," he said firmly. "I was wrong, Ino. I was an insecure teenager. I never thought that your feelings for me could be real, not when there were so many other guys out there who would be better suited for someone like you. You're too beautiful, too special for someone like me."

"It's a little too late to realize your mistakes now," she replied, she could feel her defenses crumbling.

"I know." He said, cornering her between the wall and the newly built bookshelf. "But I want to give you everything you wanted and more. I want to make everything right between us again, Ino. You will always have that place in my heart."

"You said what I wanted was impossible."

"That doesn't mean I can't try to give you what you want."

She was shaking now, trying hard not to think about how close they were, or how much she had missed him all this time. "This is unfair. You suddenly come charging back into my life without so much as a warning and expect me to take you back? After all that you've put my through?"

"No, I never expected that. All I want is a chance. We can start out as friends again if you like. I'll earn your trust again. I promise you I will."

"I don't believe you."

He looked he straight in the eyes. "I know that you would be able to tell in a heartbeat if I were lying or not, Ino. So don't lie to me about this."

She stared back at him, peering into his warm brown eyes. They seemed to see right through her, looking into the very depth of her soul. She hadn't realized that she was crying until Shikamaru lifted a hand to brush the tears from her face. He was coming closer, slowly inching toward her, their eyes still locked.

"I truly am sorry," he murmured against her lips. She closed her eyes and stood still for a moment. She questioned all of the hatred and spite that she had felt for so long, realizing that she was only trying to cover up how much she had loved him. After all this time, she had refused to forget about him. And if she couldn't love him, then she would hate him. But now, now she could freely embrace him, claim him as her own. Love him. Hold him. Cherish him. She was so overcome by emotion that she didn't know what to do or what to say.

"I…" she began, closing eyes, "I forgive you."

Those three little words made him smile, as he pressed his lips against hers happily. They moved together in perfect harmony. He pulled her closer, tightly winding is arms around her slender waist, and she moved her arms around his neck. They fit together like a jigsaw puzzle, perfectly. It was the perfect kiss, at the perfect moment. She wished that they could stay like that for all of eternity. When they finally broke apart, Shikamaru pulled her close to him, enveloping her in a warm hug.

"I love you, Ino. I always have and I always will."

She smiled into his chest and gripped him tighter. Thinking about how foolish is she was for wishing for such an impossible thing. Though their love may not have been perfect, flawless, and unblemished, it was unyielding, and heart-shatteringly happy. She could feel it in her very soul. This was what she had wanted all along. She continued to smile and leaned up to gently whisper against his lips.

"I love you too, Shikamaru. I always have and I always will."

* * *

Ah, wow that was so cheesy man. I was pretty down for the last few days, and I decided to write something like this. Yeah, I thought Shikamaru was kind of out of character, but it seemed to make sense to me while I was writing this. I mean if I were him I would react and feel the same way, wouldn't you? Reviews are much loved my dears!

Truly Yours,

WeHoldTheseTruths


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